The L(a)ost Chronicle from Toronto…Part Three

3 Sep

There was supposed to be no third part to my journey but I am writing it on Public Demand. Don’t blame me if its not as exciting or thrilling as the last two. Anyway here it goes..

CHAPTER THREE – I don’t feel like an Idiot anymore πŸ˜€

The region of Waterloo and Kitchener is small compared to Brampton with a population of only 126,742 (wikipedia claim) No this isn’t the same Waterloo where Bonaparte’s Italian ass was kicked. That Waterloo is way over in Belgium.
Whoever named the places on the world map sucked at Geography. There are two names for each place in the world. Canada has a London. UK has one too. There’s Waterloo in Belgium and there’s one in Canada too. Like a five year old kid would say, “Cheater Cock Canadians- CCC”. (PJ !! Blame it on the kid)
Yeah so I get onto an overcrowded bus and pay my fare. I find myself a seat near a woman who is talking way loudly than required on her phone of course.

Loud Mouth: ” Ok so is Mike getting the truck ‘coz I need to transfer all my stuff to my new apartment.”
Sore ear on the other end: ” If Mike transfers all your stuff, what does Mike get?”
Loud Mouth: ” I don’t know. I just coloured my hair black but I am really blonde. Was that a trick question?”
Sore ear on the other end: “No bitch ! Go find yourself another mover!” *hangs up*
Loud Mouth: “Shit network ! I hate this phone.”

She literally threw the phone back into her bag. No wonder people don’t want to help her move. She releases herself from the recent minute’s fury by removing her make up kit from the bag and starts jabbing it on her face. Make up is like a stress buster for us women not that I wear a lot or any make up. Serves as an ego booster. The poorest of poorest shall be transformed into Cinderellas with a little jab here and a little botox there. Calms you down somehow (this tip is strictly for women. Men restrain from carrying out any of the above suggested)
So anyway loud mouth is feeling good about herself again.She doesn’t really care if she moves into her new apartment without any furniture. She starts texting now. Hail the Lord !
I can’t take her presence anymore not because she is annoying but because she is pretty.
Tanned skin. Torn denim shorts. Dark jet black hair upto her shoulders. Long lashes. Practically hot ! Again I am a girl and I have no chance with her so I sulkily get up cursing my life and sit down next to a dorky guy. Its no fun at all.
By this time I think I had mastered that look on my face of “I DON’T KNOW WHERE I AM GOING AND I AM TOO EMBARRASSED TO ASK FOR DIRECTIONS.HELP!”
The guy moved in a bit to give me space and then he asks me as to where I was headed. I say UOW. He says I am going that side too. (Of course why would you be on this bus if you weren’t)
I mean why would I care where you were going. He notices the look on my face and smiles. I smile back just to be polite.
I just want to get to Waterloo asap. I just want to stop traveling. I have had enough for a day.People keep pouring in and out of the bus every few minutes. Finally destination Uo Waterloo arrives.
Now the campus is big Huge HUMUNGOUS ! I spot Wilfred Laurier (pronounced as Lauri-eh) on the other side. That’s where I am going to be hopefully next year (whomsoever reads this line shall be subjected to cross his fingers at least once for luck.Thank you).
UOW gives you the feeling of being in an intellectual space amidst the smarter section of a civilized cultured society.
I message my friend and he asks me to stay wherever I am and that he is coming to pick me up. He knows my sense of traveling and he doesn’t want anymore of me getting lost. Now I really can’t argue with that now can I so I wait.
The first thing I tell him is that I need a cigarette. He says that they don’t get it in my size there(Roaring laughter). We grab breakfast. He has a meeting with his superior at one so he asks me to walk fast. I burn my mouth on the coffee that I have bought so I get a straw and I start sipping from it.
“Amod, have you seen anyone drinking coffee from a straw before?”
“There are all sorts of idiots in the world.” 😐 (BURNNNNNNN !!!)
He shows me the campus on our little walk to the library where he drops me off. The library is pretty amazing and this is just one Departmental library. Department of Math [:|] So I sit and I am scared to explore.
There are people sitting right left centre mid-rif to me. All intelligent brainiards ! And I realise I am at the wrong place at possibly the right time so in order to gel in I do what I am really good at- Observe and then make fun of the people around ( In pure sadistic terms)
There are Chinkies, Indians and Arabs. Those three are the only races that I saw swarming in and out of the campus and its easy to spot them. The chinkies no matter if they are Japanese,Korean, Vietnamese or plain Mongolian, they are flat faced all of them (No offense. Just an observation) Second,we are a large species. Us Indians ! Brown, wearing loose clothes,bata chappals. Arabs, I seriously have no idea how they got there.
I sign in to my messengers,check my emails,buzz everyone online to keep me company for an hour and to look smart I start blogging. I do it for a half an hour when my friend comes back.
I walk out of the library and into DC. DC aka Davis Centre. The techies need to provide codecs to almost everything. Its like they can’t understand long words. They need to shorten everything to provide substantial space in their already numerically clogged computerized brains.
I check out his workplace. Its nice ! Its not even a cubicle. Now before walking into it I didn’t really know what to expect. I thought it would be a typical nerdy rat hole with deadline stamps stuck all over,research paper piles on the desks, uneaten sandwich wrappers lying around. No nothing of the sort. 6 cubicles stuffed into one. Interesting.
I like what they have done with their little domain.
Its 4:30 and I think I should leave so I gather up my things and walk out of the building. There is a greyhound bus right there. I walk up to the bus driver and ask him if the bus is going to Toronto.He answers in the affirmative.
I get on the bus. Quite pleased over the fact that I didn’t have to walk all the way back to Charles Terminal. I feel relaxed,composed, a little tired of course but its all good.Β 

I can travel in a bus ! On my own !
Now if I had said that to my friends back in India they would just laugh their bloated asses off. But I did and I have an account of it.
The journey back to Brampton wasn’t as exciting as it was when I was going there but it was more like a challenge as to what limit can I push my guts off to. 95 kms I think if you take it one way πŸ˜‰ πŸ™‚
It was funny. I was giving directions to others while on my way back.
I maybe bad with directions or places or whatever it is you may tag me with but I am no Columbus.
I, for one didn’t think that the Battle of Waterloo was fought here.
I wasn’t looking for landmarks to prove the same.
I is genius ! 😐

12 Responses to “The L(a)ost Chronicle from Toronto…Part Three”

  1. vj8 September 4, 2008 at 7:54 AM #

    U is Genius, no doubts, ;)Thanks for the third post, totally enjoyed reading the series, was nice, and hey what have you done to your blog? :PLet me find some better skin, and web apps, the Ip Tracker is kinda Scotland yard Style, hehe, πŸ˜€


  2. Sana September 4, 2008 at 2:44 PM #

    :DNow you know what I’m talking aboutArre IP tracker totally cool na..i was readin sumones blog and there it says..ARENT U IN TORONTO and i m lyk huhh !! How does IT know !?so in order to get that same reaction I put it up on mine too πŸ˜€


  3. trishula September 11, 2008 at 4:23 PM #

    ummm … would it sound lesbian-ish if i told u how i secretly enjoy reading ur blog?(i knw,i knw,tht sounds cheesy) Not tht i find it to be super informative or anything of tht sort, but do i love the way u write or wht ! I usually always resist the idea of complimenting ppl,especially for the way they write. Writing is a personal stuff for me, n boy, i get real jealous wen i see good work.It didnt quite happen in ur case.Dnt knw y…guess i jus find ur write-ups honest n real…like “no hidden agenda” kinds.ANd now am beginning to write you a mail,instead of a comment.Sigh…old habits are tough to get rid of.Well,to sum it all up, Keep writing..! I dnt wanna beg like a kid drooling at the candy kart, but ur blog makes me smile.Theres’ no hidden agenda…thrs jus u and words playing gracefully at ur finger tips.Guess i like tht. :)..ciao..!


  4. Sana September 11, 2008 at 10:14 PM #

    @ Trishula :Haha ! it was a pleasure reading ur comments and no it isnt lesbian-ish at all πŸ˜‰


  5. Zubin September 13, 2008 at 7:20 PM #

    Woha…you ARE genius..!! :dabout the hot quotient..u ain’t that bad at all..!! :PSo you can travel in buses…? Whats so big about are in Toronto after all..!! :pTry that in a local roadways bus BACK in India..!! 95..??!!? :O :Ommmm..well you are hilarious…(obviously I am fond of sadistic humour.. :p)waise…If I was one of those chikies…I wud be marching towards your home right now..!!I hope you don’t mind my OVERfriendliness..being the first time here..!!I am like that most of the time..!! πŸ˜€


  6. Nivedita September 18, 2008 at 4:17 PM #

    I love your blogs!I don’t know if that was an overstatement.youre blogs do make me feel quite inadequate πŸ™‚ But youve inspired me to start blogging even though im still too young to rite amazing stuff(my excuse for everything)as for youre misadventures in Toronto,I’ll just say youre lucky you didnt take a subway in new york.Ive still not got over my phobia.especially of the stick thin super model like people who scan you up and down nd then give this disgusted look.maybe its coz Im not a size 0.Or maybe coz I have tourist written all over me.


  7. Sana September 18, 2008 at 7:01 PM #

    @Zubin: hot quotient?Toronto or no wasnt tht easy and 95 was the distance between where i was staying to waterloo.. :Pthanks fer the comments n the hidden compliments πŸ˜› keep coming back fer more ;)cheers!


  8. Sana September 18, 2008 at 7:03 PM #

    @nivedita: thank you for those lovely commentative lines.appreciate it.. :Dadventures or no adventures..keep makin up stuff if u have to..but just keep writing ;)glad i was an inspiration. πŸ™‚


  9. Arjun M October 2, 2008 at 12:29 PM #

    Amazing amazing amazing sincerely amazing! :)you have a new fan ma’am


  10. Zainul Abedien Ahmed October 10, 2008 at 10:18 PM #

    just came across ur blog frm sumver…i dont even remember ver i started…just wanna say u r a damn gud writerpsst..just realised i can leave a comment here also after sendin u a message.


  11. Sana October 11, 2008 at 1:05 PM #

    Thanks Zainul πŸ™‚


  12. dark_one October 15, 2008 at 6:58 PM #

    My name is Diana Lee and i would like to show you my personal experience with Botox.I have suffered with migraines and neck pain for many years. Botox has given me my life back. I have arthritis in my neck and Botox is the ONLY thing that has given me relief.Side Effects-None…miracle drugI hope this information will be useful to others,Diana LeeBotox Prescription Medication


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